First Grade

I wasn’t expecting to be emotional today. Kindergarten is the one that’s supposed to send you into week-long binge-eating emotional crises, right? We’re old hat at this whole first day of school thing by now.

But kindergarten went so fast, and I’m pretty sure that nothing will be slowing down now. I look at my tall six-year-old with his half-grown front teeth and see the chubby six-month-old with the half-grown front teeth that he was about two weeks ago.

And I wish I had cherished a few more moments this summer.

And I pray that the decisions we make, the things we do and say as we raise him, will be the right ones.

And I give thanks for him.


My son does not share my weepy feelings about first grade. I asked him to show me a sad face to show how much he was going to miss me in first grade and this is what I got:


Isn’t it heartbreaking? Bahahahaha.

I think this photo best sums up his feelings.


And so another year begins– and I know that within a week this will be routine, and having a first grader will be normal, and we will await the next traumatic milestone– Stinky’s fifth birthday– as we go about our daily lives.

But today, in spite of my brave face and my proud smile and the happy cheery mommy note in his lunch box, I am mourning just a little bit.

I don’t think I really ever understood the word bittersweet until I had kids.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I need some chocolate.


12 thoughts on “First Grade

  1. He does look like he likes going to school!! Kind of a chip off the old Dad block – yes?? Chocolate sounds good, too!! We pray he will have a great year!!

  2. I’m going to quit reading your blog if you don’t stop making me cry. Okay, maybe not. But still. It’s like I need to emotionally prepare myself every time I open your blog lately!

    Ryan looked very handsome. Can’t wait to hear how his first day goes!

  3. Molly’s first day of first grade was the longest day of my life. I remember sitting by our picture window with Wes, looking for the bus to show up after school, feeling how much longer of a day for me that first grade was than kindergarten. It was a lot harder and more emotional for me than her first day of kindergarten.

  4. What a sweet boy! He reminds me so much of my almost-six nephew, who also loves school, although he is still finishing up kindergarten right now (he lives in Papua New Guinea, so his school year goes from February to December). He is so excited about it that he does his homework as soon as he gets home and gets up early in the morning to do more. He is so much more excited about his growing up than I am – I wish he still wanted me to hold his hand while he falls asleep… well, and I also wish he still lived across the street. Ok, now I need some chocolate! 😉

    I’ll be thinking of you today 🙂

  5. I know just what you mean about the ‘bittersweet’!!! Although my next milestone is getting the 2T clothes ready for fall, and preparing the potty chair & toddler bed, I remember getting those 2T clothes at my baby showers & thinking, “it will be SO LONG until I use these”, and now here it is! Good thing I”m getting the newborn stuff out again, too, or I’d be a wreck. 🙂

  6. oh yeah, they are definitely bittersweet moments. did he have all day kindergarten? the boys didn’t but zoe did and it made such a difference. i don’t think zoe’s first grade will be as hard since she was in kindy all stinking day. that was super hard. i was used to getting them home by lunchtime.

    just wait until it’s his first year of high school, then you’ll be wondering what you could possibly squeeze into the next four years to make his life worthwhile before he runs off to college and become an adult. sniff, sniff. totally stinks. totally.

    maybe that’s why i’m so grouchy lately. maybe that’s why i have anxiety and feel panic-stricken. maybe that’s why i’m so emotional and take everything everyone says the wrong way.

    and i didn’t have any chocolate.

    sigh. i think i just had a lightbulb moment.

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