Tender Heart

I had a bad day today.  I’m not talking about a little bad. I’m talking about get-in-the-car-after-work-and-freak-the-whole-family-out-by-sobbing-hysterically bad. Just a bunch of stuff, you know? And I’ve been barely holding it together anyway, so the bunch of stuff turned into a big crisis with me weeping in the passenger seat on the way home from work.

My kids haven’t seen me cry much. I’m a big goo-ball, and I get all teary and emotional about practically anything even remotely sappy, but to truly break down and cry is unusual for me.

I think the last time my sons really saw me cry was when we lost Elijah.

So it kind of freaked them out a little, especially Bubs, who in spite of his tough guy attitude has a tender little heart.

I came home and went up to my room and cried some more and vented to my husband and calmed down.

When I came downstairs, Art showed me this:

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I don’t know what else to say, except that I am so very blessed by these sweet little people God has given me.

They are my joy.

JustfortheJoyofitcopy

26 thoughts on “Tender Heart

  1. Oh my friend, I wish I could give you a big hug! Sorry about the lousy day…. I imagine that the snots were really flying, huh?

    The worst.

    But then, I’m so glad you had the chance to be reminded (in such a tangible awesome beautiful charming delightful sincere way) that you are LOVED.

    The best.

    … HE will never leave us, or forsake us….

  2. what a very sweet prayer. a prayer that resulted from your pain. that prayer brings glory to God.
    i have learned that sometimes i am in labor with pain, grief, fear, hurt… and sometimes i just need to give birth to it, and then i “feal” relief.
    i have worried about my kids, how it affects them. i don’t want to hurt them. but this post, this glory, is typically how they respond.

    be blessed.
    hope.
    trust.
    wait… you’ll see, keep faith.

    i’m praying for you.

    and i also wanted to say your beautiful. your words, heart, vulnerability, what i see here on this blog, just a fraction of you-
    is beautiful.

  3. holy cow. i love that kid. i’m coming to get him right now. i’m on my way. i’ll be there in about 15 hours. we can have coffee. 😀 hang in there, girl, you know where to find me if you need me

  4. Awesome. I absolutely cannot wait to babysit my friend’s four kids this weekend. My arms feel so empty… and it’s not time for me to be a mom yet.

  5. Oh, I just had one of those days yesterday! I am so very sorry. And yet, sometimes it seems that others are at their best when I’m at my worst (just to compound the guilt, you know?). I love the prayer. You must be doing a good job, Mama (and Daddy, too, I’m sure.).
    I love the verse that reminds me that God’s mercies are new every morning. How humbling. How loving.

  6. What beautiful words! Your little one is concerned, that is sweet. It isn’t often we let them see how we truly feel, but I think they can sense it anyway.

  7. Precious…brought a li’l tear to my eye, too…what a sweet li’l guy you have with a gift to bring things before the Lord…I think he must have learned that from some very God-focused parents… 🙂

  8. erin… i am late in reading… and i am hoping that today is looking brighter for you. of course, just seeing those sweet heart scrawled words could turn almost any world around. i am adding another heap of prayer…

  9. Your son gave to you and us.
    But you gave to him… showing that it is okay to be scared and completely wracked with emotion. Human.
    And press on beautiful woman… one step at a time. You will look back on this .
    From a firmly rooted garden of life.

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