I don’t know how exactly the idea came to me. It was brilliant, though.
I had seen an ad for a portrait package at Sears. For only $8 or so, you got a whole ton of portraits. With Christmas coming up, the timing could not be better.
My sister and I pooled our meager resources and talked to our mom’s best friend, who quickly became our co-conspirator and willing chauffeur.
What more could parents want than portraits of their beautiful daughters?
Our first order of business was choosing clothing for this epic event. We quickly decided to wear matching shirts that we had recently bought at Shopko, or possibly K-Mart. With great anticipation we planned and giggled and planned some more.
The big night arrived, and I adorned myself in my awesome clothes, did my hair, and put in some seriously cool plastic earrings. My sister, determined that a girl who was old enough to be a part of top secret portrait plots was old enough to do her own hair, did just that. She swooped her permed hair into a side pony and then, with much application of water, hair gel, and hair spray, she swooped her bangs in the other direction.
She would not listen to me when I told her it looked stupid. She will tell you now that it was my fault. That I, as the older child, should have taken her hair matters into my own hands.
My sister is in severe denial as to her 9-year-old intractability. She was convinced that she looked gorgeous and I was just being annoying and bossy. So I refuse responsibility for her hair foibles.
The outfits, yes. Her hair, no.
On Christmas morning, we were so excited to see our parents’ faces when they unwrapped their amazing gift. One 8×10, two 5×7’s, two sheets of wallets, and one sheet of teensy-weensy little pictures– like 40 to a sheet– all of this:
I’m sure you can imagine what joy my parents experienced. Especially when they found the page of “portrait minis” or whatever they were called.
Fear the Dalmatian Sisters and their black spots of horror.
Her birthday is next Tuesday so I’m going to have to do something really amazing to make up for this, huh?
(maybe I could buy her a scrunchie).