I never realized you thought so much about what our future together might hold. I never knew that the same fears that keep me awake at night also haunt you.
I am so glad that you meant that whole sickness and health thing.
Will you promise to push my wheelchair fast someday? And can we try to find a bright pink one, just for fun?
Will you rub my back every night like you do now, even if it’s all twisted and weird? And will you please paint my toenails crazy colors?
I love you so much. I love how you smile and how your hands are so strong and gentle at the same time.
If the day comes when you have to shave my legs, I trust you not to cut me all up. But if you’re scared, it’s okay. We can try some Nair or one of those electric razors. Or we can just let it grow out, but you have to promise not to call me Hairy Gorilla Woman.
You are a gift I don’t deserve, and your eyes crinkle when you laugh and it is the best thing in the whole universe and I love you more than the whole universe.
I’m sorry I can’t be the kind of wife you do deserve. Although you probably wouldn’t have as much fun with her anyway. Someone that perfect couldn’t be nearly as funny as I am.
If we have to install one of those chair lift things to get me up the stairs, I’d really like to find one that plays music as it goes up. And can you find someone who can fix it so it’ll go fast, so we can have races?
And if I ever get to the point where my hands are so bunched up and ridiculous that I can’t write or type, and if the joint in my throat closes all up so I can’t talk, can we learn morse code so I can talk to you by blinking? And will you write down everything I blink to you so I can write my memoir?
You are amazing and the best husband I could ask for and I know the road ahead will be bumpy and painful and downright ugly sometimes. I am so glad I have you to share it with. I love you with all my heart.
Your Swollen Wife
P.S. If you go bald will you get mad at me if I draw things on your head while you sleep? What about if I make one of the kids do it, signaling to them in blinky morse code what I want them to draw? Hello?