Life Goes On

Life goes on, even when it doesn’t–
even when some deep part of my heart
has stopped beating
and my soul can’t breathe.

I don’t know if it’s comforting or not
to think that outside the four dead walls of my heart
the world spins with its joy-and-sadness, birth-and-death,
sunrise-sunset whirlwind.

You post about your latest meal on Facebook,
and the news anchor chats about spring training,
and I put dinner in the oven and a load in the dryer,
and everything seems so very normal,
but I just want to scream at everyone to STOP
and notice me, here, going through the daily motions
with a part of my beloved heart
dead and buried deep inside me.

Light your candle for me tonight.

********This poem is written in memory of my two lost babies, and in honor of all my precious friends who have carried children within them that they will never meet this side of heaven.

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6 thoughts on “Life Goes On

  1. i cannot image this pain… only i do… when i think of your babies and say a prayer for your heart and wonder. and when others have to trek through it. and it breaks my heart… and don’t know the half of it. much love, and peace to you heart today, sweet friend!

    xoxo

  2. i want to take the time to tell you that i see you. and i want so much for you to be held in the arms of Jesus and to be comforted, and to feel some Love come to you, some light to hold back the darkness…to see you through.
    hope, faith and Love fill you and remain with you…and never leave you.

  3. i felt it , the ache that is always there when i read “life goes on, even when it doesn’t.”

    i heard the name caleb last week, and that ache swelled within me. this world, this life will never be perfect. missing caleb reminds me of that.
    and maybe the sweetness is being reminded of that imperfect…and then of the Hope that this is not my home either.

    hugs. lots of them.

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